DEALING with ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP

By Christian Nwaeze

In Benue state, recently there has been media reports of violence against women.

There was report about Orungwa Terhemba Moses who allegedly violently assaulted his wife, Mngohol in Makurdi.

Wife of Orungwa Culled From Evadoosh.com

And one Mr. Iorfa kelvin beating up his sister to a state of coma in a video that was trending on social media.


Another woman, Mrs Margaret Gwebe, a Deputy Bursar at the Joseph Sarwuan Tarka University of Agriculture Makurdi who has been constantly maltreated and abused by her husband for more than 12yrs.

This does not come as a surprise as Benue state according to a 2021 report shows that Benue state is one among the top states in Nigeria where women experience violence against them.

Abusive relationship cut across all age and gender. But it’s possible to have a happy relationship.

Emotionally or physically abusive relationships can scar partners, and it will take a lot of time and effort to undo the damage done.

 Here are some of the tips on how to deal with abusive relationship.

Gauge the temper of your partner

Know your partner mood swing especially what easily makes your partner angry or happy. Once you know all this it will help you a lot.

Remember it is very difficult to have healthy communication when you have a partner with anger issues.

 Every disagreement or dispute is dangerous as it can lead to an assault on you.

Know your partners’ weakness.

Knowing your partner weak point will actually help you to buy time for yourself.  Also your partners' weak point may be your opportunity to get to him or her to have a meaningful and healthy interaction that may not led to violence.

Explore your partner circle of friends or relatives

Find out much about your partner from people around him or her. Friends and families have great impact on your partner's life and character.

They can help you understand your partner better and how to engage and coping with his weakness. After all no human is perfect.

Know when to run.

After exploring all options, you must also be mindful of when to run away.

 Abusive relationship sometimes end with serious consequences like death. So if it is obvious that the abusive nature of your partner can lead to fatality.

 You don't need to waste time trying to make it work. Do the right thing-RUN!

Your life, personal safety and happiness matters a lot. So run if you have to.

 I believe that if you apply these four tips it can help you deal with abusive relationship.

What do you think?
















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